We all go through moments in life that feel awful. Moments that make us wish we never have to get out of bed. We avoid these moments because they can be extremely painful. Some may be more irritating or exhausting, and others have us whispering to the floor to open up and swallow us whole.
There is a myriad of reasons why these troubling moments trigger such negative feelings within us. We have all been programmed from the moment we were born to comprehend what is acceptable in our society and what isn’t, how to behave in a way that will end in approval or rejection.
Beings that were born wild and free were indoctrinated and forced into molds. It’s no wonder we look about and see an endless sea of troubles. It’s funny, though, because the same troubles we run away from have enfolded within them, the very answers we are desperately looking for.
I have to marvel at the Universe’s sense of humor. She placed the seeds of transformation at the center of our troubles. The more we enter our pain with acceptance and trust, the more peace and love we find. What we resist persists. So the only thing we can do is Let Go.
There is this magnificent, intelligent consciousness that flows through us and throughout all of Life. When we decide to let go and trust this intelligence, we begin to experience new ways of living. As we walk through life and experience pain brought on by others or ourselves, our brain tends to hold on to those memories.
We keep the memories that are the most painful, closest to our hearts. They are our reminder not to fuck up and let those we love hurt us again. We tend to remember the bad moments more clearly than we remember the good. We hope if we do not forget, we won’t make those same mistakes again.
In a way, it helps us feel safe. And yet, the decision to hold on to those painful memories keeps us reliving them repeatedly. It keeps the pain fresh in our minds. These memories keep us in misery and all in the name of protecting ourselves from future hurt. It an insane loop.
Once we become aware of what we’re doing, we can begin the journey of letting go and forging a new way. A better way. Throughout my journey, I learned that peace is found within. Joy and love are found within. All the qualities that I was searching for outside of myself had been inside me all along.
So if heaven is within, then what are troubles really, and why do they exist? For years I viewed troubles as an unwanted thing that wasn’t welcome in my life. I resisted all problems vehemently. Then I learned that these so-called “troubles” are treasures.
They show us who we really are, not who we think we are. They show us what we really believe about ourselves and the world around us. They help our growth deepen. Without them, we wouldn’t get very far. For example, my body has always been a source of trouble.
Having six kids is no easy feat on the body. Losing weight after each pregnancy was tough, but I was adamant about doing so. My body was something I looked down on when it wasn’t doing what I wanted it to do and lavished it with praise when it finally seemed to behave.
I thought this way for a long time and still get stuck in these toxic thoughts today. I had a shift in perspective that helped me transform those thoughts. I realized the trouble is not and never has been my body.
The problem is the societal structures that told me since I was little that my body needed to look a certain way to be deemed beautiful. The treasure in that trouble was learning that my issues were more profound than what my body looked like.
I realized I had an enormous, destructive system of belief within me that had been passed down through the generations and needed to be dismantled. This unfolding knowledge put me on a path of self-love and is teaching me what it truly means to love my body, mind, and spirit.
Troubles become problems because we view them as problems. What if we took a different approach? What if, instead, we questioned our perception of our troubles? Everything we think we know is constantly changing. That is never going to stop.
So honestly, what do we actually know? Nothing. This is an incredibly freeing way of thinking, and it allows us to look at a situation from multiple angles. So now, when my mind is quick to label a situation as problematic, I take a pause and see what that specific situation is trying to teach me.
I look for the treasure hidden within. It’s important to ask yourself questions. Why am I feeling this way? What thoughts or ideas do I hold within that have led me to this emotion? Do they serve me? If they don’t, how can I begin to let go of them? What thoughts or ideas do I want to replace them with?
When we tackle our troubles from a place of love and understanding, we begin to create bliss within ourselves and our daily lives. That bliss will spread and start touching the lives of those around us as well because that’s what love does. It can’t help itself. Love expands and unites.
Quotes:
Pain is not tragic. Pain is magic. Suffering is tragic. Suffering is what happens when we avoid pain and consequently miss our becoming. – Glennon Doyle
You have to see the problem as the portal and so recognize that the symptoms and stressors are meaningful and brilliantly intelligent in waking us up. – Alan Watts
It is important to expect nothing, to take every experience, including the negative ones, as merely steps on the path and to proceed. – Ram Dass